Moving On Up...

Well moving out anyway!

Please Baby Please will be moving to a new blog host which means I will have a new address. I am really excited about it! I am going to a more user friendly blog host AND I have enlisted the help of a really talented graphic designer who is going to give my blog some style.

Please Baby Please has become so important to me, and one day I can't wait to share it with our next child, so it seemed right to me to invest a little more of "me" into it. I didn't realize how much I would enjoy this outlet, so rest assured even after we are done "getting pregnant" this blog will just morph into more about the rest of our lives.

I can't wait to reveal the new blog to you. Of course, I long for the day when I get to reveal something even more important, but in the mean time this is pretty exciting for me!

Aside from that, I wrote a blog post late last week after taking a pregnancy test. I knew when it came back negative that I needed to start my monthly healing process. Friday night, after work, I went for a cocktail with two girlfriends from work, just one ;), and headed home to sulk a little. Quite honestly, I had to cry it out. I put on some music and soaked it away in a really hot tub. Sometimes, I find a little peace in indulging in things I know I wont be able too once I finaly get a bun in this oven. That night it was one Crown & Ginger and a HOT bath. I cried a little... ok maybe more than a little, and then I decided to get back up and at em'.

One of the hardest parts about all of this, is the fact that my mom and best friends are 400 miles away. Don't get me wrong, Mike is amazing, but he isn't a girl, anddd I know this isn't easy on him either, so sometimes I just don't want to make it worse on us. I have made friends here, wonderful friends, that I love dearly, but they have busy lives and plenty going on and I don't want to intrude. Not that my best friends from home don't have busy lives, just that I don't mind intruding. haha. I miss my girls back home, my mom most of all. Those girls know me, and when I'm going through something they force me through it. Maybe I need a Charleston trip, or better yet... maybe they should come visit, hint hint.

Anywho, Today is Wednesday. Today is a new day, and day 3 of my cycle. Today I had an ovary check, to clear me for medicine again. No cysts! Praise God, take heart in His blessings big or small, right? Me not having a cyst may seem small in the scheme of things, but I will take it with a grin on my face. Today I will start medicine again. Pills for 5 days, then another ultrasound, then the shot, then potentially an IUI again.. if you read this blog, it's old news.

That being said, if this month doesn't work out how we are hoping, Mike and I will be attending a class at our doctor's office on IVF. Those scary 3 letters. Whew. I have been praying a lot about this lately. This June will mark the 5 year anniversary of my surgery, and 4 years of us trying to concieve. That is a long time. A long, taxing time. I am doing my best to remain patient, but at what point do you just say enough already! A what point is it ok to look into something more? My doctor seems to agree that we are there. She told me she is happy to keep going with my treatment now and believes it will eventually get us where we want to go, but at what cost and how long? I don't want to get to a point where I hate this. I mean I hate that I can't just get pregnant of course, but I certainly don't hate life right now. I have bad days. Mike can atest to that, but I have really great ones too, just like everyone else. I don't want the negative to out-weigh the positive and maybe IVF is our path. I just have to keep praying, asking for God's will, guidance, clarity, patience. patience. patience. I also want to do what is best for my body. I don't want to increase risk anymore than I have too, and between my endometriosis, cysts, fibroid, etc. IVF may be the easiest, safest way.